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  • Cześć! Skąd wracasz?
  • Z dworca kolejowego. Odprowadziłem teściową do pociągu.
  • A dlaczego masz taką brudną dłoń?
  • Z radości poklepałem wagon.
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Trzy zakonnice rozmawiają. Pierwsza mówi:

  • Wczoraj, gdy sprzątałam biuro księdza, znalazłam tam stos gazet pornograficznych!
  • I co zrobiłaś z nimi? - spytały zakonnice.
  • Wywaliłam je wszystkie do śmietnika.

Druga siostra:

  • Gdy odkładałam wyprane ubrania księdza do szafy, znalazłam tam opakowanie prezerwatyw!
  • I co zrobiłaś?? - spytały znów zakonnice.Przedziurawiłam je szpilką.

Trzecia siostra zemdlała.

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Ksiądz wypytuje dzieci na religii:

  • Kto wie ile Adam i Ewa byli w raju?
  • Do jesieni. - odpowiada jedno.
  • Dlaczego do jesieni?
  • Bo musieli poczekać, aż dojrzeją jabłka.
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Punk Franek radzi się swojej dziewczyny:

  • Powiedz, co mam robić? Uprałem skarpetki i tak mi się zbiegły, że nie wchodzą na moje nogi. 
  • Powinieneś umyć również nogi.
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2002: Wyremontuję całe mieszkanie.

2003: Odmaluję całe mieszkanie.

2004: Wysprzątam całe mieszkanie.

2005: Wymiotę pajęczyny w całym mieszkaniu.

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2002 Będę uprawiał sex codziennie

2003 Będę uprawiał sex co tydzień

2004 Będę uprawiał sex co miesiąc

2005 Kupię lepszy żel do rąk

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