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Jasio pyta Tatę:

  • Jak myślisz, ile kilometrów jest z Warszawy do Lublina?
  • Sto osiemdziesiąt.
  • A z powrotem?
  • Tyle samo.
  • Niemożliwe! Przecież między gwiazdką a Nowym Rokiem jest tylko jeden tydzień, a między Nowym Rokiem a gwiazdką prawie cały rok!
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W grudniu Jasio napisał pocztówkę do Mikołaja:

  • 'Mikołaju! Mam biednych rodziców. Prosze Cię, przynieś mi rower górski i klocki Lego.'

Na poczcie jedna z urzędniczek niechcący przeczytała pocztówkę Jasia. Zrobiło jej się smutno i pokazała ją kolegom z pracy. Wszyscy postanowili zrobić Jasiowi niespodziankę. Złożyli się na klocki Lego i wysłali mu je w paczce.

Po świętach ta sama urzędniczka czyta drugi list od Jasia:

  • 'Mikołaju, dziękuję za klocki. Rower pewnie ukradli na poczcie.'
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Mały Giovani, który jest synem szefa sycylijskiej mafii pisze list do św. Mikołaja:

  • 'Mikołaju! Jak z pewnością wiesz, przez cały rok byłem grzeczny i sprawiłbyś mi wielką przyjemnosć przynosząc kolejkę elektryczną'.

W tym momencie koło pokoju chłopca przechodzi ojciec, więc mały Giovani zaczyna pisać list od nowa:

  • 'Mikołaju, byłem grzeczny, więc przynieś mi dwie kolejki elektryczne'.

Ojciec chłopca wchodzi do środka z kilkoma mafiozami, więc Giovani zaczyna pisać list po raz trzeci:

  • 'Mikołaju, jeśli chcesz jeszcze kiedykolwiek zobaczyć swoją matkę...'
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Dwaj staruszkowie spędzają wspólnie święta. Patrząc na gwiazdę betlejemską, jeden z nich wspomina:

  • Moja żona, kiedy zauważyła spadającą gwiazdę, powiedziała: 'pomyśl o czymś, a twoje życzenie spełni się, kiedy gwiazda spadnie'.
  • Co było dalej? - pyta drugi.
  • Życzenie się spełniło. Gwiazda spadła na nią!
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Do śwętego Mikołaja podchodzi dziesięcioletni skin i mówi:

  • Dziadu, daj piwo.
  • Ja prezenty daję tylko grzecznym dzieciom.

Skin odwraca się, woła starszych kumpli i mówi:

  • Wytłumaczcie temu staremu dziadowi, że ja jestem grzeczny.
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Przed świętami św. Mikołaj rozdaje prezenty na ulicy. Jasio po otrzymaniu jednego z nich mówi:

  • Święty Mikołaju, dziękuję ci za prezent.
  • Głupstwo - odpowiada święty Mikołaj. - Nie masz mi za co dziękować.
  • Wiem, ale mama mi kazała.
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